I've been getting messages asking where I am, I know I've been very quiet and not very proactive. 2017 was, without a shadow of a doubt, the best year of my life as both a Mistress and in the vanilla realm, but something happened, something a little strange.....
It was the end of 2017, I'd been on 12 flights, lived on a yacht, traveled all over Europe, had a pool and a second jacuzzi installed, bought the car I always wanted, had a wardrobe full of the things I like, had all the gadgets I ever wanted and a wonderful inner circle who ensured I had everything I wanted or needed. It had been such a busy year that I hadn't had the time to stop and contemplate just how good things have been. My clips fan base has grown HUGE and I get so many e-mails each day from new people that it's sometimes hard to keep up. I just want you to know that I really do appreciate my fans, slaves and subs.
Just before I flew back to the UK autumn was setting in and as I live in the countryside there isn't much to do but prepare for winter (Which is arctic so requires a lot of prep). Suddenly, I had a lot of time to think. I sat in my sprawling country estate, the car I'd always wanted to own parked outside, the countries I'd always wanted to visit ticked off the list, the pool I'd always wanted glistening in the sun, my hot tub bubbling away......and I suddenly had this terrifying thought - 'I've got everything I ever wanted 30 years earlier than I expected to have it, what now?'........I just want to point out that none of these things just landed in my lap, despite being a Findom, most of what I get comes from hard work (I.E. Making clips and selling/promoting them), it may be adult business, but it's the same as any other business (Though I do love the fans and slaves far more than most love their customers). If I'd have put the same effort into a vanilla product and sold it online, I'm 100% sure I'd have made the same success of it, especially if it was a product I had the same passion for as I do D/s and making clips. Anyway, back to this terrifying thought......
I've always been highly motivated, but this terrifying thought stopped me in my tracks, and, I began to feel a little strange about it all, not happy, not sad, but confused...I guess one could say 'deflated'. This horrid feeling really gripped me and a downward spiral begun to the point of being pretty damn miserable. So I know what most of you are thinking at this point 'How can you be sad if you've got everything you've ever wanted?', well, what's left? Do I now sit here waiting to die while enjoying the pool and making clips a few times a month?
Despite being a 'Goddess' sometimes the Domme in me has to take the vanilla me to one side and 'Have a word'. I went to where I always go when I'm confused about life, Mr Alan Watts, my favourite philosopher. After reading and listening for some time I came to a conclusion, and that was, I MUST answer the question 'What next?' and fast!
I made some decisions. The first was my health, what good is having all the worlds riches if you're not healthy? While I do eat an exceptionally good diet (I watch my veg grow and often know my meat on first name terms) and last year attended the gym 3 times a week along with swimming and freediving, I still feel I'm not the fittest I COULD be. I created a gruelling routine and set a date to begin training 4-5 times a week.
Then came business, I never want to give up being a Domme, I love it, so I decided I was going to set days aside each week for my duties as a Domme. I also then decided that in 2018 I would invest in more property (Hopefully two) and start an alternate business that is still media and adult based, but different to what I do now, work is well underway on that front.
Well, the date arrived and I began my routine like Rocky on speed, I was ready to fight the world. By the 4th session (in a row) I was walking like a nymphomaniac BBC (British Broadcasting corporation) presenter who'd accidentally walked into the wrong 'BBC convention'. This proved problematic for my other interests, how can one type if one can't lift ones arms? I've been completely shattered since starting this routine and am now heading into week 3, I refuse to quit as I know within a month or two I'll have energy I didn't have before, and of course as a positive side effect I'll look hotter than ever .......and that brings me to you, my slaves and my fans.
I know a lot of you want me to message you and interact daily, but, sometimes I have to take a time out to refresh and reconsider my life's path, and, some times I have to go away to 'Upgrade' myself mentally and physically.
Just because I'm quiet doesn't mean I'm not with you, I'm constantly thinking of the next file, the next clip, how I can improve both here and in the vanilla realm, so, if I'm quiet for a little while you know it's because I'm making things better not just for myself, but, for my fans.
2018 is going to be the year I achieve the things I never even considered achieving.......and you're coming with me! :)
As soon as I'm used to this insane amount of training, I promise you that I'll be back with more determination than ever before.
Change of plan
January 21, 2018
Hello lowly ones!
The 1st of November brought amazing news, and, in turn, I've decided to make some big changes in the way people serve m...